What’s your parenting style?
Parenting can be challenging with the many decisions a parent has to make as they bring up a child and impact on their life. Each decision made makes a short or a lasting impact on a child. An almost every day decision is discipline. How do you discipline your child? What form of punishment do you use?
Parenting styles have an impact on children. How you interact with your child will affect them for the rest of their life. It is of important to ensure that the parenting style is supporting the healthy growth and development of a child. Something interesting about parenting; its basis is not on a marking scheme as to who is first or last. We raise our children in various ways. This variance is so interesting in that same parent would apply different parenting styles on his/ her children. The combination of strategies used by a parent in raising a child is that which is referred to as parenting style.
Here are a few questions for us to ponder on:
- How do you discipline your child? Are you strict? Do you explain why you are disciplining? Do you permit or you are never involved?
- How do you communicate with your child? Are you open? Do you give directions? Or is communication one way?
- Do you intentionally nurture your child? Or less nurturing? May be you do not nurture?
- What goals and expectations have you put up for your child? High, Flexible, No limitation, clearly stated?
Research shows there are four parenting styles:
These parents are mostly referred to as disciplinarians. They commonly use punishment and are strict. Their mode of communication is mostly one way- parent to child, with little or no room for the child to give their opinion. They have high expectations with little flexibility and are little nurturing.
This parent gives their child a lot of freedom, being less involved with the child’s life. They hardly apply any form of discipline. Communication may be limited, little nurturing and a few or no expectations on the child.
With this parent, the reason for disciplining is explained to the child and the rules are clear. They are open to communication with the child and nurture them. The goals and expectations are well stated allowing the child’s input. Children with parents who apply this style tend to be self- disciplined and emotionally intelligent.
This parent allows their child to do what they want with little or no guidance. They have minimal or no rules and allow the child to solve issues on their own. While communication may be open, they prefer the child making their own decisions other than giving guidance. These parents tend to be nurturing and warm, with minimal expectations if any.
Having reflected on the above questions what’s your style? Is it healthy for your child?
Deuteronomy 6:7 ESV, You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.